The Quiet Drift Toward Selfish Ambition

I didn’t notice it at first. It started small—snapping a quick photo of an event for the ministry page, posting a recap video after camp. No big deal, right? But then I caught myself thinking about how many likes it got. I wondered if other youth pastors would notice. Before long, the win wasn’t just about students meeting Jesus. It was about the post that followed.

Ezekiel 34 hit me in the gut the first time I read it with fresh eyes this week:
“Woe to the shepherds of Israel who have been feeding themselves! Shouldn’t the shepherds feed their flock?”

God wasn’t vague. He didn’t say, “Hey guys, just remember to balance self-care with shepherding.” No. He said woe—a word that signals serious trouble. Why? Because the people He loved were starving, and the leaders were full.

Here’s the uncomfortable truth: selfish ambition in ministry doesn’t usually announce itself. It creeps in. We tell ourselves it’s about reaching more people, building influence, “expanding the Kingdom.” But underneath, there’s a part of us that wants validation, applause, maybe even envy.

And social media? It pours gas on that fire. You start measuring success by engagement instead of transformation. You feel pressure to make everything “Instagrammable,” even sacred moments that should never be staged. Slowly, the flock becomes a backdrop for our personal brand.

God’s heart for shepherds hasn’t changed. He still expects us to feed His sheep, to know their names, to sit with them in their mess. Students don’t need a celebrity; they need a shepherd who will show up when no one is watching.

If I’m honest, this isn’t just theory for me. I’ve had to ask myself hard questions:

• Would I still lead with the same passion if nobody ever saw it?
• Am I preparing messages for likes—or because students desperately need truth?
• If my platform disappeared tomorrow, would my ministry collapse?

Here’s what I know: God can raise up another shepherd in a heartbeat. I don’t want Him to look at me and say, “You were too busy feeding yourself.” I want to be found faithful, even in the hidden places.

If this stirs something in you, don’t ignore it. I’ve been there. I know how hard it is to lead with pure motives in a world that rewards performance. If you need someone to process this with, I’d love to help. Let’s set up a coaching session and work through it together.